Friday, September 24, 2004

The All-Seeing Eye Never Saw It Coming

Originally uploaded by MrSnuggleBunny.
If you see only one work of complete fantasy this year make it this one!

STARRING: The Bloggers of the world as the noble yet unassuming hobbits * Michelle Malkin as the beautiful elf-maid Arwen * Ann Coulter is the feisty warrior babe Eowyn * Bill Burkett as the conflicted Gollum/Smeagol and Terry McAuliffe as Wormtongue. Haven't decided who gets to play heroic Aragorn, the love interest of both Arwen and Eowyn, it was either W or me. Screw it, W is Gandolf and I get the babes! (Yes,I did the Photoshop myself.)

This whole episode is, pardon the pun, rather surreal. I'm not covering this one in much detail because others far more qualified than I have already done so, i.e. and

I would, however, like to note how Bill Burkett is starting to, umm, crack. He says Joe Lockhart urged him to give the documents to SeeBS. Lockhart says he's 99.9% certain they never discussed the documents. How Lockhart could not have discussed the one subject that has occupied the mind of an obsessive compulsive stalker for years is anybody's guess but I'll hazard to say Lockhart is hedging like a weatherman who gives percentages for the chance of rain. Whatever the truth is he can't be accused of misstating anything. In translation what Lockhart is saying is, "There's a 0.1% chance that we did talk about it but nobody will find out." I'll take those odds.

Burkett's going wobbly means that CBS and the Democrats will have to work real hard together to avoid the appearance of, well, collusion. Personally I think we should merge the two entities into the collective initials of DNCBS, call it a 527 and have done with it.

If Mary Mapes' father is even half right about her being a rabid feminist she'll be the next to crack because she won't become the fall *ahem* guy for the old boy network of Rather et al. DNCBS will have to impeach their "unimpeachable source" meaning Burkett, pitiable unstable sod he is, is GOP meat. Not since the heady days of Roe v. Wade have the liberals devoured their own with such rapacious frenzy in the name of a political agenda. The TANG story may finally be dying once and for all--of embarrassment. TANG got astronauts to the moon but it can't get Kerry to the White House.

Which brings me to the real issue: Nobody is voting FOR John Kerry, only AGAINST George Bush. Heads are indeed going to roll but who is going to fall on their sword to keep Kerry from taking the 10-point poll hit? Lockhart sure as hell isn't going to do it if Hillary is holding the contract to his soul until the 2008 election cycle. Rather seems too stupid to even admit the memos are faked. Burkett won't save Kerry if he has to sacrifice his true fixation: GWB 2.0. Mapes? Maybe she could give up this whole crazy journalism life, settle down and start a nice family.


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